Wednesday, November 10, 2010

11/10/10 - Attack of the Bitch Monster

Well gang, today is the first day that I have woken up feeling almost human. No nausea (slight nausea), no headache, no dizziness, check it! But you know what happens when you wake up feeling good? The Bitch Monster takes over your body. I have threatened to kill more people today (in my head) than ever before. The guy who (I feel) parked too close to me in the Target parking lot, the old woman who took a life time to fill up her way-too-big-for-an-old-lady van at the Costco Pump, and the man who insisted he'd wait in the alley for me to park my car instead of going around me and getting the hell out of my face. Oh yes, and there was the lady who jumped 100 feet and screamed "Ok, ok, ok!" when she SAW my dog off a leash in the grass in front of our house. My dog who is a kind hearted labrador. My dog who didn't even know she existed. My dog who didn't even come close to her. I should tell you, I used to be scared to death of dogs. Did I react with compassion? No. You know what I yelled "Get over it!". Get over it??? OMG! Are you KIDDING me?? Where is this coming from.
It probably didn't help that I started my morning out teaching two classes, both of which were full of people straight out of the Twilight Zone. Let me highlight! The first class was a weightlifting/cardio combination class. As we transitioned into jumprope about 5 people take a seat on their benches as if they're staging some sort of sit-in and one woman (who came in late and didn't have the proper equipment) starts wandering around class asking people if she can just have their jumprope, including me. What? The second class is a mind/body cardio class. Lights are off, peaceful music is on and we're moving. Two girls in the front are talking SO loud I can hardly hear myself. Some dude in acid washed jeans bounces in and starts talking to one of my members as if it's now social hour at the Elk's Club. One girl decides she's had enough and takes a seat against the wall and begins FILMING the class with her cell phone. This is not just me today gang. The Bitch Monster came out for SURVIVAL, I tell you!
Oh, I've also decided I'll post pictures as the weeks tick by so everyone can see just how quickly the Tic Tac is ruining both my life and my body.

1 comment:

  1. You had every right to go into bitch mode - your first class was full of crazies yesterday...